Where is Sana?
I am here…..still here …alive and breathing the air of the lower Himalayas.
I am moving to the mountains close to nature to work on a 6 month very exciting project which I wont talk much about right now till its over because this might mean setting shop for a while which is what I have been wishing for a while :)
New beginnings and exciting times full of adventures and new experiences.
I am grateful even though the year has been as crazy as the last and the lessons keep piling up and I am trying to go through them one step at the time. Life seems to be a never ending learning and its awesome though someday I wish for a break to just sit in nothingness. It is not happening much right now but I feel at peace with my decisions to work in India and give this new life a chance.
Wish me luck and keep me in your prayers.
I am not sensitive , you are an asshole.
I struggle with letting go of people and relationships even if they have become super unhealthy, run their course or become a plain waste of time and energy.
I’ve been wondering why is it so hard for me to realize and accept this reality and move on. I wonder if its because I have no roots or attachment to anything else other than people.I love people and it really hurts me so bad and I find it hard to put into words how difficult the process is for me. I wish I was stronger but I almost invariably stay in all types of relationships mainly with the hope that things will change for the better. I still can’t fully grab the concept of how things can change so drastically between people who love each other whether it be friends, partners, family. Like everything does love also go from one stage to another lessening or increasing in strength depending on circumstances..yes probably but how does it come to the point of not wanting to have anything to do with the other or just cutting people off. Sometimes that is the best thing to do so that both parties can move on but I would rather be in a relationship that stinks because letting go seems worse. Since nothing else is consistent in my life I want at least for the relationships to last even when they are way passed the maturity date. I am struggling with this and really it boils down again to the concept of self worth, self love that I also can’t get my head around fully.
Ofcourse I understand that nothing remains the same and impermanence is the name of the game , and I am totally comfortable with change but the thing that I need to really put myself into is getting out of relationships that are not worth holding on to and realizing that letting go is the best way to have some peace and happiness for both parties involved.